Thank Goodness for cereal

How else would I have learned about the world wide web. Did everyone else know about this?
It was like eating the store name brand of raisin bran opened up a whole new world for me.
I learned that, and I quote, "there is no speed limit on the Internet highway." You mean to tell me I can go as fast as I want without getting caught for speeding.

Luckily this magnificent box helped me learn about emoticons, a way to express my emotions whilst not speaking one word.

AMAZING PEOPLE!!!! AMAZING!!

when did this happen?

When did I become a ma'am'? I was at the rodeo today, yes a rodeo. This is what my life is now that a certain someone has decided the child is my sole responsibility and mine alone. Why should I get to go to Vegas or New York? How silly of me to even hope really. So, at the rodeo a young cowgirl asked me if I was my uncle's sister? Now, my uncle is not THAT old, and he started having kids later in life, so he does have a nearly six year old. I have a nearly two, but does this really qualify me as his sister? Maybe I should track down this cowgirl, who couldn't have been more than nine, and ask her if she meant to say "much much younger sister?" my uncle's brother, (who is also my uncle obviously) is only a mere two years older than me.
But I find it happening more and more, this being grouped with the older crowd, I'm not even married (well soon, hopefully) DAMNITT!! Doesn't that count for something? Being called "ma'ma." Could I at least pass for 25? 24 maybe? I really want to go play the "guess my age" game with a random stranger who would be honest, yet kind. I don't think I look too old, maybe I need to start wearing more sunscreen, do a few chemical peels, maybe a face lift.

That's me on the left, I got the head scarf at an early bird special at Macy's...


Technically I'm still under TLC's "no miniskirts over 35" rule. WAY under.
Maybe just more sleep, will help. It can only get worse from here, I'm worried I'm aging before my time, I'm still in my prime people, right?

Its all about the setting

I got to thinking about parents who work full time and leave their kids with nannies, or in day care, or with sitters. I have never wanted to be one of those career women who leaves my kid to be raised by someone else during the day, and me at night. Now, granted for some people there's not an option whether they want to or not they have to work, they go to provide for these precious little creatures we call children. There are some who do have the choice, and choose work, not there's anything wrong with that, I just think differently.

I realized it's the little moments in my life that have made me feel this way, it's the unexpected kiss from the little guy, or the from the back hug that you didn't see coming (that doesn't turn into a hair pull). It's the unexpected new tricks that he learns, that make me swell with pride. Let's not lie, its putting him down for a nap and having a couple hours to shower, clean, or waste time blogging about things people don't even read. But I decided some of the best things that happens is the dialogue throughout the day, stuff you'd never say or hear if you were at an actual office, and I'll share some of these with you today, right now,;

"Why do you think you need to sit on some one's head just because they lay down? No one likes that."

Me: "I think it's your turn to pull me in the wagon, I'm tired."
Nearly 2: "Okay," gives great effort, grunts and all, then falls on the grass, keeps trying, "Mommy, heavy."
My self esteem plummets, I laugh anyway.

"Where's your helmet?"

Me: "What are we going to have for lunch?"
Nearly 2: "Poppers!"
Me: "No."

Nearly 2:"Mom, bum hurt."
Me: "Your bum hurts?"
Nearly 2: "Yeah"
Me: "What should we do about that?"
Nearly 2: "Bum cream."

"Do you need to go potty?"

Nearly 2: "Vroom, vroom, gurgle, vroom. Beep beep."

Me:"Why are you pulling my hair? That's hurts mommy."
Nearly 2: "Be nice," He says as he turns to petting my head.

Nearly 2: "Cuse me" (Excuse me)
Me: "I'm not moving so that you can eat toothpaste."
Nearly 2: "Cuse me"
Me:"You are using very good manners, still we don't eat toothpaste."


I picture these things being said in an actual office, and just have to laugh.

My compliments to the Chef

So I got to thinking the other day about compliments, how I'm bad at taking them, what a good compliment actually means, and sometimes things that are meant as compliments but are actually not even close.

We'll start here; I am so bad at taking compliments I think I always have been, I almost view it as admitting and fully succumbing to the fact of your own importance and awesome-ness. Once accepting this compliment how do you live up to all the glory that surrounds it? Day in and day out how do you perform the tasks that qualify you to actually accept the compliment? So this is why I shun them at all costs.

You know what I do think is a nice compliment though, "She's such a doll." What a nice thing to say about a person, people love dolls. In fact they love dolls so much they actually buy them houses, what nicer way to express your love and devotion other than buying someone a house? Calling someone a doll is like saying you love and adore them so much you'd buy them a house!!! That's HUGE!! For the record I've never been called a doll, but whatever.

One of my favorite compliments is when our person says to another, "We make cute kids together." My interpretation of this; my hotness + your hotness has created even more hotness, my goodness we are so GOOD LOOKIN'!!

Sometimes things are given as compliments but in reality are not actually compliments. I have the perfect example from the other day, "You're like a commo expert." What? This is what my life has been reduced to. The truth is I want to be good at my job, but to be called an expert at something that is so non thought provoking and so unimportant, that's just embarrassing. If I were a doctor perhaps, and a patient was like "Oh you're an expert in solving the problems that pertain to my nostrils." Now, that's a compliment, but telling me I'm an expert at fulfilling the needs of my flight attendant friends, well not as huge of a compliment.

I also want to clear the air as far as what nicknames can be taken as compliments:
---"Champ!" Meaning, they think you are a real winner, perhaps a champion of their heart.
---"Scout," the person calling you this finds you friendly and helpful, and may think your skills at using a compass are very appealing.
---"Sport" You're athletic looking, muscular, and you're good at stuff. (You're Mindy's Kyle Corver.)
---"Smart Ass" Not only do I like the way your mind works, I also like the way you sit, what perfect posture.

So as far as compliments go they're easier to give and harder to receive a lot like herpes.

Vintage Wedding Refashioned Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!

Vintage Wedding Refashioned Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!